I was supposed to begin the treacherous process of studying for finals today, but I couldn't. Rough night, you might say; 24 hours later, I am still reeling and trying to stop my head from spinning. This is almost worse than the time I got food poisoning. Almost.
My flight home has been booked and, now, it's just a matter of getting through this week.
I've realized that every time I am at school, I want to be home; whenever I am home, all I can think about is returning to La Jolla. This really only makes the rain cloud hovering over my head just that much bigger.
I have also come to realize that I don't know what I want. There is this great gaping chasm that, try as I might, just won't close. I can't figure it out, but, honestly, living day-to-day with the feeling that something is missing makes my life really frustrating and miserable. I try not to let it manifest on my face, so as not to give anything away, because, frankly, even when people mean well, I hate being asked "Are you okay?"
Don't I look okay?
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